I have come to realize

I must face the truth
I have come to the realization and it's not an easy thing to say. However I must confess that I am gay. Over the last few years my desire for men ,cock and cum has grown and grown to the point that I no longer want a woman or desire a woman. Now when I do see a sexy beautiful woman, I just wish I could be her. What I desire most of all now is Cock I don't know why but I find them totally attractive. It probably has to do with me being m*****ed by my Dad's old partner and his wife when I was young. I don't want to say that it was a horrible experience because it wasn't. I really enjoyed when he would fondle and play with me. I love the sexual feeling I got when he would touch me and I enjoyed touching him. At first it was just touching and a few times I was introduced to more sexual experimentation and cross dressing by his wife. I learned how to masturbate a man and then I learned how to suck cock and eventually I was introduced to anal intercourse which I must say, I enjoyed immensely. Even though it hurt at first. I eventually came to realize that I was his girl and was to please him as a girl. I also enjoyed the sexual power that his wife taught me that I had over him which I would not abuse. However I learned that although I was young I could still command his wants and desires. Although I did go away for a while and walk the societal norms of manhood I have realized now I have come full circle back to where I am and want to be.... That is to be a sexual instrument for men a sex toy.. to give them love and sexual pleasure like no woman can because they don't understand what a man wants and needs....Crazy isn't it ??